Today my wife told me she will bring back my son and daughter to her hometown and asked me to join them 1 days before they are due to fly back. This is due to the fact I want to travel along with my whole family (wife and kids). I felt like the whole world has crashed on me and I hope the whole just swallow me up.
To me, the most joyful thing after a day of hard work and stressful day at work is to hug your children and play with them. I understand that my kids will not be with me forever, but if one is in my shoe, you can't even look ahead for 1 week, so why worry about the future? Maybe one may think, it's just a week. But currently with all events that happen in my life, the only comfort I can find is my 2 kids and Buddhism. Each time I went to temple to pray, it gives me a sense of calmness and I felt at peace with myself. Similarly when playing with my kids, I feel very at ease. They are so innocent.
But I told myself, I have to face each adversity with determination and never give up. It is easier than done. Maybe I am too emotional and I placed too much emphasis 'in another person' shoe. I just hope my parents and my wife can stay peacefully under 1 roof. Each time my parents only come 1 - 2 months. I am very sad. I tried to be a filial son, but I fail. I failed to support my parents and failed to give them happiness. I really wish I could do either one. At this moment, my hands are tied.
Other people may said, why I sad? There is no death, serious sickness, accident in my family. But whatever happened in my family, it is just as bad. It is difficult to write in writings. Maybe God can see my problem from the sky. But I am sure there are more suffering in this world, especially those who die, lost their family, relative and friends through the natural disaster, poverty, etc. If God is helping them first, I really do not mind. They deserve more help.
Everybody got their problem. Buddha said all beings will suffer from birth old sickness and death. Other sufferings can be as bad. I just wish mine can be over as soon as possible.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Jack Neo saga
Everyone in Singapore should surely heard at least part of Jack Neo stories. From a famous guy, he will surely become more famous, for the wrong reason. My mum told me 2 senior citizen had a heated discussion on who is at fault. Ironically, an old man thought Jack Neo is at fault while another old woman thought the mistress is at fault. Therefore, we can safely eliminate sexist biasness.
Personally, and quite clearly, both Jack and the mistresses are at fault. And the victims are Jack's wife and the 4 kids. Well, is it easy to judge the situation from a third party point of view. Like I said in my blog on Tiger Woods affair, it all remain to be seen if Jack is really sorry for this transgression. George Yeo is too soon to rush into comment that everyone must rally around Jack Neo and his family. Would he do the same if this guy is not Jack Neo? What kind of family values George Yeo is promoting? I hope he realize that if the affairs is not with just one, two women, there are so many women who are involved. Could this be just a moment of foolishness? Also, aren't Singapore government is trying so hard to protect minors from sexual advances from guys? Haven't we heard that Jack actually asked the french student wait for her at hotels?
I have to say I am a big fan of Jack Neo movies. He is a really creative director. His movies really reflects our society today which I suppose attracts many viewers because it is as if some part of our lifes are mentioned in the movie.
What I could do is I assume Jack is really sorry. Every human makes mistake. The press should really leave his family alone, if they are really sincerely in helping his family. Since his wife already forgave him, so should his sons and daughter. Let them move on.
Personally, and quite clearly, both Jack and the mistresses are at fault. And the victims are Jack's wife and the 4 kids. Well, is it easy to judge the situation from a third party point of view. Like I said in my blog on Tiger Woods affair, it all remain to be seen if Jack is really sorry for this transgression. George Yeo is too soon to rush into comment that everyone must rally around Jack Neo and his family. Would he do the same if this guy is not Jack Neo? What kind of family values George Yeo is promoting? I hope he realize that if the affairs is not with just one, two women, there are so many women who are involved. Could this be just a moment of foolishness? Also, aren't Singapore government is trying so hard to protect minors from sexual advances from guys? Haven't we heard that Jack actually asked the french student wait for her at hotels?
I have to say I am a big fan of Jack Neo movies. He is a really creative director. His movies really reflects our society today which I suppose attracts many viewers because it is as if some part of our lifes are mentioned in the movie.
What I could do is I assume Jack is really sorry. Every human makes mistake. The press should really leave his family alone, if they are really sincerely in helping his family. Since his wife already forgave him, so should his sons and daughter. Let them move on.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Chile earth quake and Tsunami
I have read with sadness that the mother nature has unleased its fury again on Chile less than 2 months of Haiti earth quake. It is another moment of sadness. For the past 2 days, I chanted Compassionate Sutra and dedicated the merit to the people of Chile. Normally I would have dedicated the merit to happiness, safety, peaceful for my entire family. But surely the victims of Chile needed more compassionate help than I do.
I have just read from the newspaper that people who stayed in the Pacific Ocean coast continue to enjoy their life at the beaches despite the Tsunami warning. I total agree with the scientist to issue major Tsunami warning to the states. This is because life are valuable and should not be taken for granted. If I were the scientist, I would also do the same. They are trying to save life. If the Tsunami is smaller than expected, then everybody should be relieve as there is no life loss and property damage are very limited. Afterall, it is a 8.8 earth quake. Next time if the same happen (which I hope not for many years to come), I hope scientist continue to be conservative in protecting living being. Of course being accurate in prediction makes a scientist famous but morally it is more noble to use the position which millions of people in the Pacific coast entrusted with to take care of their life. Also next time, I hope people take the warning more seriously. Even those who do not care for their life, they should care for the love ones feelings. The love ones will suffer in sorrow when one dies.
Meanwhile, I hope anyone who read my blog, please offer your sincere prayer and assistance to the victims of earth quake in Chile and Haiti.
I have just read from the newspaper that people who stayed in the Pacific Ocean coast continue to enjoy their life at the beaches despite the Tsunami warning. I total agree with the scientist to issue major Tsunami warning to the states. This is because life are valuable and should not be taken for granted. If I were the scientist, I would also do the same. They are trying to save life. If the Tsunami is smaller than expected, then everybody should be relieve as there is no life loss and property damage are very limited. Afterall, it is a 8.8 earth quake. Next time if the same happen (which I hope not for many years to come), I hope scientist continue to be conservative in protecting living being. Of course being accurate in prediction makes a scientist famous but morally it is more noble to use the position which millions of people in the Pacific coast entrusted with to take care of their life. Also next time, I hope people take the warning more seriously. Even those who do not care for their life, they should care for the love ones feelings. The love ones will suffer in sorrow when one dies.
Meanwhile, I hope anyone who read my blog, please offer your sincere prayer and assistance to the victims of earth quake in Chile and Haiti.
Friday, February 26, 2010
How to improve Singapore birth rate
As we know, Singapore population will age as we are moving towards the 2050. I will be into my late 70s by then. I will have many people in my same age group. Singapore is moving the right step by making public facilities easy for the aging population. They are also taking the correct step to improve the birth rate. But unlike improving public facilities, improving birth rate is beyond the control of the government.
Do you know why? I am a Chinese. Being a typical Chinese, I want to give the best for my 2 kids. I wasn't referring to all the branded things for the kids, or travelling to Europ, USA, or Eton childcare. These are beyond my means. Even if I can afford, I also believe in letting my kids grow up in a moderate life and understanding what hard earned money means. My net salary is about $3,800 after deducting CPF. Here are my expenses
1.) Child care - $1,100
2.) Grocessry - $350 (I made monthly purchase at Carforr, using POSB everyday card to enjoy 5% discount and free delivery)
3.) PUB - $180 (my kids likes aircon, by the way, I am using inverter)
4.) M1 - $80
5.) StarHub - $90
6.) Donation - $300 (don't ask me why I donate so much, I just think that other disadvantaged people need the money more than I do)
7.) MRT - $60
8.) My insurance and my 2 kids insurance - $400
9.) Personal expenses - $800 (including weekends outing for family)
As you can see, i hardly have any savings. How does one expect me to have more than 2 kids? Even though government is giving me child bonus of $20,000, this is more like striking 4D which I can finish within few years. As you can see, by right, I should have supported my parents through their retirement years. Afterall, they supported me until I complete my bachelor degrees, but with my income and expenses, how do I do that? Certainly, I do not expect my kids to support me either when I retire and they join the work force. Can you imagine how I am going to have enough savings for my 2 kids university and my retirements. Actually, I always dream of working as a volunteer. It's the best job in the world, with no office politics.
Overall, I can find that it is difficult for Singaporeans to improve the birth rate, despite the givernment is trying hard to minimize the cost of living like granting GST rebate. They have to understand that these rebates are subjected to year-to-year fluctuation. There is no certainty that the government will continue the rebates. The government should consider keeping a lid on the living costs directly. No doubt, the government wants the people to have better living standard. But are they really enjoying the better living standard? For example, I used to stay in Upper Aljunied Lane. The hawker centre food used to be very nice and cheap. After renovation, some of the hawkers have to move out as they cannot afford the higher rental. Those who can afford will raise the cost of food. I used to enjoy the carrot cake before renovation. After renovation, I tried the carrot cake, it tasted worse, despite been cook by the same person. I cannot think of another reason other than the hawker told me she does not rent the stall anymore, but someone else did and hire her to fry carrot cake. So to me, a good living standard started with good and cheap food. The excess money from cheaper food can increase my purchasing power in other area. I mean, if I really want good environment, I would rather go to restaurant.
Do you know why? I am a Chinese. Being a typical Chinese, I want to give the best for my 2 kids. I wasn't referring to all the branded things for the kids, or travelling to Europ, USA, or Eton childcare. These are beyond my means. Even if I can afford, I also believe in letting my kids grow up in a moderate life and understanding what hard earned money means. My net salary is about $3,800 after deducting CPF. Here are my expenses
1.) Child care - $1,100
2.) Grocessry - $350 (I made monthly purchase at Carforr, using POSB everyday card to enjoy 5% discount and free delivery)
3.) PUB - $180 (my kids likes aircon, by the way, I am using inverter)
4.) M1 - $80
5.) StarHub - $90
6.) Donation - $300 (don't ask me why I donate so much, I just think that other disadvantaged people need the money more than I do)
7.) MRT - $60
8.) My insurance and my 2 kids insurance - $400
9.) Personal expenses - $800 (including weekends outing for family)
As you can see, i hardly have any savings. How does one expect me to have more than 2 kids? Even though government is giving me child bonus of $20,000, this is more like striking 4D which I can finish within few years. As you can see, by right, I should have supported my parents through their retirement years. Afterall, they supported me until I complete my bachelor degrees, but with my income and expenses, how do I do that? Certainly, I do not expect my kids to support me either when I retire and they join the work force. Can you imagine how I am going to have enough savings for my 2 kids university and my retirements. Actually, I always dream of working as a volunteer. It's the best job in the world, with no office politics.
Overall, I can find that it is difficult for Singaporeans to improve the birth rate, despite the givernment is trying hard to minimize the cost of living like granting GST rebate. They have to understand that these rebates are subjected to year-to-year fluctuation. There is no certainty that the government will continue the rebates. The government should consider keeping a lid on the living costs directly. No doubt, the government wants the people to have better living standard. But are they really enjoying the better living standard? For example, I used to stay in Upper Aljunied Lane. The hawker centre food used to be very nice and cheap. After renovation, some of the hawkers have to move out as they cannot afford the higher rental. Those who can afford will raise the cost of food. I used to enjoy the carrot cake before renovation. After renovation, I tried the carrot cake, it tasted worse, despite been cook by the same person. I cannot think of another reason other than the hawker told me she does not rent the stall anymore, but someone else did and hire her to fry carrot cake. So to me, a good living standard started with good and cheap food. The excess money from cheaper food can increase my purchasing power in other area. I mean, if I really want good environment, I would rather go to restaurant.
Monday, February 22, 2010
How good is Man Utd?
I have been supporint Man Utd for the past 30 years. And I have genuine concern that they will do a Liverpool, especially when Sir Alex Ferguson is no longer their coach. Personally I like Jose Morinho to take over. Yes, he is a elegant and proud coach, but his track record is there for everyone to see. He likes Man Utd. The players like him. But I am not sure if the Glazers like an outspoken coach like Morinho.
I think it is very stupid of the Glazers to burden the club with interest. I hope a billionaire will take over this club. They have very good coach like Sir Alex. One thing I like about him is he is frank. He supports the Glazers but agree that the supporters to critisize the Glazers. In another words, he does not suck up to their balls. This is good as he can buy a player he wants. I agreed with him that just because he has 80 million pound to spend does not mean he has to pay premium for a player, no matter how good he is. Another thing I like about Sir Alex is he bears no grudge, against Beckham, Ronaldo. What has happened has passed, he just focus on Man Utd football future. A lot of people gives him the stick for a sore loser. Which coach likes to lose? One thing I disagree with his view is he lets Tevez go. Tevez is a good player and he formed a good partnership with Rooney. Berbetov is a good player but he is not Tevez.
Man Utd should buy a creative midfielder who can split the defence and a backup striker for Rooney. They also need a left winger who is as good as Valencia.
I do hope Man Utd is as good as they always be. Be competitive, invest player at a right price. But please reduce the footballing debt. It does not make sense. Has the Glazers give a projection when the current business model can fully redeem the debt?
I think it is very stupid of the Glazers to burden the club with interest. I hope a billionaire will take over this club. They have very good coach like Sir Alex. One thing I like about him is he is frank. He supports the Glazers but agree that the supporters to critisize the Glazers. In another words, he does not suck up to their balls. This is good as he can buy a player he wants. I agreed with him that just because he has 80 million pound to spend does not mean he has to pay premium for a player, no matter how good he is. Another thing I like about Sir Alex is he bears no grudge, against Beckham, Ronaldo. What has happened has passed, he just focus on Man Utd football future. A lot of people gives him the stick for a sore loser. Which coach likes to lose? One thing I disagree with his view is he lets Tevez go. Tevez is a good player and he formed a good partnership with Rooney. Berbetov is a good player but he is not Tevez.
Man Utd should buy a creative midfielder who can split the defence and a backup striker for Rooney. They also need a left winger who is as good as Valencia.
I do hope Man Utd is as good as they always be. Be competitive, invest player at a right price. But please reduce the footballing debt. It does not make sense. Has the Glazers give a projection when the current business model can fully redeem the debt?
Tiger, actions speak louder than words!
So, the hidden Tiger has reappear, saying sorry countless time and hope everyone will accept it. Does that mean he is forgiven? No. He must follow up with action. He must treat his family well. Spend more time with family. Golf and family should be his love, not the mistresses. If he brought up his family well, then he is truly repent. Everyone in golf world likes to have him back. But they must understand that he has higher priority now. As for Elin, give Tiger a chance to start over. Do not take advantage of the situation and impede family happiness. After you agree to join him in his therapy right?
As to all Tiger mistresses, they can sue Tiger for monetary compensation and move on. They are willing parties and surely they knew Tiger is married when they slept with him. So why the grievences? Do they expect Tiger to marry them? Maybe some are led on on this and should be excluded. But no matter what, monetary compensation is sufficient. You do not need to publish a book and tell the whole world just for the sake of money. Tiger's 2 kids are innocent, so learn to let go and let the kids grow up normally.
As a Buddhist, Tiger should have known the bad Karma faced by him in future, even though he is a billionaire.
As to all Tiger mistresses, they can sue Tiger for monetary compensation and move on. They are willing parties and surely they knew Tiger is married when they slept with him. So why the grievences? Do they expect Tiger to marry them? Maybe some are led on on this and should be excluded. But no matter what, monetary compensation is sufficient. You do not need to publish a book and tell the whole world just for the sake of money. Tiger's 2 kids are innocent, so learn to let go and let the kids grow up normally.
As a Buddhist, Tiger should have known the bad Karma faced by him in future, even though he is a billionaire.
Religion should not mix with Politics
How many people joins politics so that they can serve their people better, by giving them better life, higher knowledge, low crime? Not many, in fact I would dare to say, if 1% of politicians fall into that category, we should be very happy.
Now Dalai Lama has visited US. Everyone knows China is not happy. A smart person like Dalai Lama should have known it too. He should be happy that President Obama is granting him time for discussion. Why does he need to approach the reporters after the meeting and let them know he was happy with the meeting? My personal view is he is trying to settle a score with China. If so, being a person who preach Buddhism, why does he seeds hatred? I agreed the Tibet is unique in terms of religion, culture, and something China should have preserved and not interfere. President Obama also agrees and that should make Dalai Lama happy. Yes there are political detainees who suffers but as a leader, I think he should reduce the suffering, rather than keep on fighting a losing war. Having said that, I hope China leaders will give autonomy to Tibet, let the common people live their lives. Many of them just want to earn a living and grow their family. Every single human race in this planet does. So try to find a win-win situation. From what I see from Dalai Lama visits to US, he does not want peace for Tibet. He is more interested to get independence. Does independence make the Tibetans live better? Many more will suffer as a result of this fight. On the other hand, as I have said, I have China will not suppress Tibet people. If so, there is no need to Tibet to fight to independence.
I am not saying China or Tibet is right or wrong. I just hope there will be less suffering for people in Tibet, but I do not think Dalai Lama can achieve that.
Now Dalai Lama has visited US. Everyone knows China is not happy. A smart person like Dalai Lama should have known it too. He should be happy that President Obama is granting him time for discussion. Why does he need to approach the reporters after the meeting and let them know he was happy with the meeting? My personal view is he is trying to settle a score with China. If so, being a person who preach Buddhism, why does he seeds hatred? I agreed the Tibet is unique in terms of religion, culture, and something China should have preserved and not interfere. President Obama also agrees and that should make Dalai Lama happy. Yes there are political detainees who suffers but as a leader, I think he should reduce the suffering, rather than keep on fighting a losing war. Having said that, I hope China leaders will give autonomy to Tibet, let the common people live their lives. Many of them just want to earn a living and grow their family. Every single human race in this planet does. So try to find a win-win situation. From what I see from Dalai Lama visits to US, he does not want peace for Tibet. He is more interested to get independence. Does independence make the Tibetans live better? Many more will suffer as a result of this fight. On the other hand, as I have said, I have China will not suppress Tibet people. If so, there is no need to Tibet to fight to independence.
I am not saying China or Tibet is right or wrong. I just hope there will be less suffering for people in Tibet, but I do not think Dalai Lama can achieve that.
Thank you is very expensive
This morning, I sent my 2 children to school together with my parents and wife. I always enjoy doing so. To me, spending time as much quality time with children is priceless. (Sorry, I do not work in Mastercard)
Anyway, as usual, my elder daughter who is 3+ likes to go to the classroom window to say goodbye to us. On our way out from the childcare, my father (who was the last one out) tried to hold the door open for another parent and close the door himself. That woman simply walks pass without even seeing my father, not to mention saying a word thank you. Obviously my father is very disappointed. So I asked him, what can he do? He likes friendly people. If he is in the receiving end (another person open door for him), there will be more than 1 thank you from him. I know him well.
So I tell my father, he should just do what he thinks is right. He should not feel disappointed if there is no thank you in return. Not everybody is born equal (in terms of courtesy). The society has changed. It is a very materialistic world. Everything else is not important. I was wondering what if the person who open the door is my daughter? Should I tell him in future, just walk out, let the person behind you close the door? It is difficult to teach kids moral when the adults are not practicing it. My parents do not see that this is important as long as their kids achieved straight A, get into good schools & universities, earn a high pay job. Afterall money can do many things and bring happiness right?
I hope majority of parents will realize that money is not the root cause of happiness, but moral is.
Anyway, as usual, my elder daughter who is 3+ likes to go to the classroom window to say goodbye to us. On our way out from the childcare, my father (who was the last one out) tried to hold the door open for another parent and close the door himself. That woman simply walks pass without even seeing my father, not to mention saying a word thank you. Obviously my father is very disappointed. So I asked him, what can he do? He likes friendly people. If he is in the receiving end (another person open door for him), there will be more than 1 thank you from him. I know him well.
So I tell my father, he should just do what he thinks is right. He should not feel disappointed if there is no thank you in return. Not everybody is born equal (in terms of courtesy). The society has changed. It is a very materialistic world. Everything else is not important. I was wondering what if the person who open the door is my daughter? Should I tell him in future, just walk out, let the person behind you close the door? It is difficult to teach kids moral when the adults are not practicing it. My parents do not see that this is important as long as their kids achieved straight A, get into good schools & universities, earn a high pay job. Afterall money can do many things and bring happiness right?
I hope majority of parents will realize that money is not the root cause of happiness, but moral is.
Finally I am a blogger!
I have read about blogging, facebook, twitter everyday. I do not understand why people will spend so much time on this social networking tools. Now here I am, creating my own blog!
The real reason for doing so is because I am not a good at communicating verbally. I am only good at writing, because it gives me time to pause and think of what to say. In verbal conversation, maybe I have time to think, and maybe I am a slow thinker, therefore I cannot always commuicate effectively to the other party.
Anyway, I would like to share my view on events that happen around us and to me personally.
The real reason for doing so is because I am not a good at communicating verbally. I am only good at writing, because it gives me time to pause and think of what to say. In verbal conversation, maybe I have time to think, and maybe I am a slow thinker, therefore I cannot always commuicate effectively to the other party.
Anyway, I would like to share my view on events that happen around us and to me personally.
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